Negative self-talk: how it affects us

What is self-talk? Self-talk is the internal dialog we all have ongoing through our minds every day. This internal dialog can take two forms, positive and negative.

Are you a positive thinker or a negative thinker? Do you tell yourself: Yes I can do this. I can reach my goal. Or do you tell yourself: I will never get that job so there is no point going for the interview. I am fat. I am stupid.

We all have moments of self-doubt where we question whether we can achieve something, but the difference between a constant negative thought pattern and a positive one is the difference between a person who never feels good enough and a person who feels content with life, happily challenged.

We all know those people who seem to have it all. They are always so happy. But when you stop and look at their life next to yours they have nothing more than you - sometimes they even have less than you. The difference is their internal dialog is set to positive; they look for the positive and they appreciate the things they have got.

Negative self-talk affects us in many ways. It can lead to stagnation, self-pity, depression and many more negative influences. When we repeat a negative statement over and over again we begin to believe it. “I am not good enough” may prevent us from taking the steps to achieve a promotion that we are easily qualified for. It gives us a lack of confidence that isn’t based on anything real, but reinforced by the internal negative dialog. Eventually these thoughts become all consuming and you find that you approach every aspect of your life with this negativity, beginning to feel stressed easily, depressed and having a lack of confidence and motivation.

Changing the internal dialog to positive statements makes our life better and assists us in moving forward, giving us the confidence to achieve our goals. If instead of saying “I am not good enough”, say “I can do this”. Not only will you achieve your goals but you will happier and healthier. Positive self-talk gives you a permanent cheerleader in your corner, one that carries positive messages to all areas of your life and helps you to move forward. Once you have this positivity no one can take it away from you, as it comes from within you, from your own though process.

Very often the nature of our self-talk originates from a very early age. It may be a teacher that said you weren’t good enough, or a parent that always made you believe anything is possible.

Hypnotherapy, CBT & NLP can help you to challenge the source of the negative thoughts and change them to positive ones. Eventually you will surround yourself with positive thoughts and that will create an environment that will allow you to live your best possible life.

Here a few easy steps to start to become positive:

· Smile more.

· Replace your negative thoughts with positive ones. This can be hard at first. Start by talking positively. When you have a negative thought or catch yourself about to say something negative, stop yourself and see if you can spin it on its head and turn it into a positive one. Soon this will become second nature and you will find yourself thinking in the positive first.

· Expect positive results. When you set a goal expect that not only will you achieve it but you will be better than you thought.

· Actually visualize the success you want. Picture it in your mind, picture what you DO want, rather than having a list of what you DON’T want. Have an image of what you DO want, and see yourself achieving your goal.

We all have the ability to retrain our minds, we do it every day. Give it a go. What do you have to lose? Nothing. What could you gain? Everything.

© EKTherapies

Negative self-talk: how it affects us

What is self-talk? Self-talk is the internal dialog we all have ongoing through our minds every day. This internal dialog can take two forms, positive and negative.

Are you a positive thinker or a negative thinker? Do you tell yourself: Yes I can do this. I can reach my goal. Or do you tell yourself: I will never get that job so there is no point going for the interview. I am fat. I am stupid.

We all have moments of self-doubt where we question whether we can achieve something, but the difference between a constant negative thought pattern and a positive one is the difference between a person who never feels good enough and a person who feels content with life, happily challenged.

We all know those people who seem to have it all. They are always so happy. But when you stop and look at their life next to yours they have nothing more than you - sometimes they even have less than you. The difference is their internal dialog is set to positive; they look for the positive and they appreciate the things they have got.

Negative self-talk affects us in many ways. It can lead to stagnation, self-pity, depression and many more negative influences. When we repeat a negative statement over and over again we begin to believe it. “I am not good enough” may prevent us from taking the steps to achieve a promotion that we are easily qualified for. It gives us a lack of confidence that isn’t based on anything real, but reinforced by the internal negative dialog. Eventually these thoughts become all consuming and you find that you approach every aspect of your life with this negativity, beginning to feel stressed easily, depressed and having a lack of confidence and motivation.

Changing the internal dialog to positive statements makes our life better and assists us in moving forward, giving us the confidence to achieve our goals. If instead of saying “I am not good enough”, say “I can do this”. Not only will you achieve your goals but you will happier and healthier. Positive self-talk gives you a permanent cheerleader in your corner, one that carries positive messages to all areas of your life and helps you to move forward. Once you have this positivity no one can take it away from you, as it comes from within you, from your own though process.

Very often the nature of our self-talk originates from a very early age. It may be a teacher that said you weren’t good enough, or a parent that always made you believe anything is possible.

Hypnotherapy, CBT & NLP can help you to challenge the source of the negative thoughts and change them to positive ones. Eventually you will surround yourself with positive thoughts and that will create an environment that will allow you to live your best possible life.

Here a few easy steps to start to become positive:

· Smile more.

· Replace your negative thoughts with positive ones. This can be hard at first. Start by talking positively. When you have a negative thought or catch yourself about to say something negative, stop yourself and see if you can spin it on its head and turn it into a positive one. Soon this will become second nature and you will find yourself thinking in the positive first.

· Expect positive results. When you set a goal expect that not only will you achieve it but you will be better than you thought.

· Actually visualize the success you want. Picture it in your mind, picture what you DO want, rather than having a list of what you DON’T want. Have an image of what you DO want, and see yourself achieving your goal.

We all have the ability to retrain our minds, we do it every day. Give it a go. What do you have to lose? Nothing. What could you gain? Everything.

© EKTherapies

Stress

Stress seems to be the buzz word at the moment but what is stress?

Stress is when you have insufficient resources to meet your demands.

Stress and anxiety are normal, even healthy, human feelings that can be useful to help you achieve your goals. The chemicals that are released when we are under stress or feeling anxiety can help you to meet deadlines, keep presentations fresh, help actors to make every performance have that spark, even help athletes win their gold medal and give us the energy to do amazing things in times of crises. Stress and anxiety only become a problem to our health when they go on for too long and we don’t expel the chemicals put into our body that are generated by it. Eventually these chemicals can become an illness affecting your mental and physical health.

We, and the world around us, are very good at putting stress and anxiety into our lives but you should ask yourself how long do you spend each day de-stressing yourself?

With the advance in technology making us more contactable and bringing the office into our home life, it has never been so important to make sure you de-stress yourself, being in the moment and enjoying life for what it is, allowing time for ‘you’.

Some signs that you may not be de-stressing yourself enough:

MIND

Do you feel tired or lacking in energy all of the time?
Do you have episodes of panic?
Do you feel worried all of the time?
Are you unable to concentrate on a task for as long as you used to be able to do?
Do you feel unusually irritable, with tasks or people, or get angry quickly?
Are you finding getting to sleep difficult, or are you waking earlier than usual?
Do you wake up feeling tired even though you have slept enough for your body?
Do you feel there is never enough time in the day?
Do you walk quickly everywhere, thinking about certain tasks rather than enjoying the walk/moment?
Do you feel you have so much to do that you can’t focus on one thing and try and spread yourself and your time too thinly, not giving your full attention to anything?

BODY

Do you ever experience a strong or rapid heartbeat? (Sometimes known as “palpitations”)
Do you grind your teeth, either in your sleep or when you are awake?
Do you have regular or constant pain or tension in your muscles?
Do you find that you are often contracting/holding onto your muscles (e.g. shoulders up)?
Do you find that you breathe shallow breaths?
Do you find yourself breathing quickly or more heavily at times of anxiety?
Are you experiencing indigestion or diarrhea?

If we understand how stress and anxiety affect our body and mind, then we can learn how to use this to our advantage, allowing ourselves to relax and de-stress at the end of the day and enjoy the ‘free’ time we have. We will then be more productive and focused at work and at home, feeling calmer and in control. Hypnotherapy, CBT & NLP can help you to understand stress and how it affects your body. Teaching you relaxation techniques and giving you the tools you need to help you enjoy life with a healthy level, for you of stress and anxiety.